Duality is the mind-created idea that separates each of us from the unique events playing out in our reality. Hence, everything in our existence happens apart from us in such a way that we can point to something out there that causes the various outcomes we observe daily.
In so doing, we never have to take responsibility for what is happening if what is happening is not happening to us.
However, even if it is happening to us, rarely will we acknowledge any responsibility for such events.
Duality creates a false victim-ness that we all fall into.
Because of events occurring out there over which, we have accepted, we have no control, life happens to us rather than by us.
Our separation from the events occurring apart from us seems to make taking responsibility for our life less important and certainly not a creation of our own making.
Duality creates a false out there, thus a false sense of security and allows ego to continue its pernicious game of deception. The deception keeps us from knowing who we really are, rather than who we are conditioned to think we are.
There is a lot of New Age thought these days that says those who we attract into our lives are a mirror image of who we are. Sometimes we are told they reflect back to us what we need to change in our own lives, so we can move on to other personal growth opportunities and new encounters.
In truth, it is much deeper than this.
The egoic mind has no desire to change itself, but allows the deception that we attract what we are into our experience so it can go about what it does best - blaming out there for everything wrong or right in our lives.
Ego's real game is distraction.
In other words, those we supposedly attract into our experience have nothing to do with our improvement. Rather they become part of the drama and noise ego thrives on to keep us from looking at our false selves.
Our false selves are our egos.
As long as ego is able to keep the focus on anything out there, it never has to worry about the only thing it is truly afraid of - that being who we really are - God!
Very simply, duality exists outside of who you really are and ego cannot exist in a non-dual state.
Any attraction you believe is occurring in your life is really distraction.
It is the distracting of that which you really are from what your ego has identified you with outside of yourself.
There is no such such thing as full ego, except in duality and in such a state, the God that you are is hidden from view.
The only way out of this is to accept that everything in your existence is a distraction - distracting you from the knowing of that which you truly are.
And you are God!